Archie's Domain
The cat. The boss. The desk invader. The cheese criminal.
Cat Monarch
Meet Archie
Archie was found abandoned during the Beast from the East storm and adopted in 2018. Since then, he has promoted himself to household management, claimed Welshie’s spot as his own, and developed very strong opinions about food, cheese, and desk invasions.
He is the resident cat monarch of the store: unimpressed, demanding, suspiciously comfortable, and fully convinced that every stream setup exists for his personal convenience.
Name
Archie
Role
Household Boss
Favourite Food
Sheba
Desk Status
Invader
Known for: stealing Welshie’s spot, demanding attention, judging everyone, and appearing exactly when the desk is needed most.
Weaknesses: chicken nuggets, Dairylea cheese, and anything he has no business eating.
Now Playing
Archie’s Theme - Archie Time!
The official Archibald chaos anthem. Approved for stream use, somehow.
Archie’s Many Moods
A small collection of Archie emotes, because the household boss contains multitudes. Mostly judgement.
Judgement Archie
He has seen enough.
Cheese Archie
Dairylea detected.
Desk Goblin
Welshie’s desk has been claimed.
Sleepy Boss
Unavailable due to nap business.
Catnip Mode
The system is unstable.
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Nugget Alert
Chicken has entered the room.
King Mode
Archie's default setting.
Archie Bongos
Noise mode, activated.
Archie Scream
Archie is angry, Archie is offended.
Real Boy
Look at this magnificent specimen.
Archie's Belongings
Archie-approved corners of the site: His humans and the place to fund his food.
Who is Archie? ▼
Archie is the resident cat, household boss, and self-appointed ruler of the family. He joined the family in 2018 after being abandoned during the Beast from the East storm and has been in charge ever since.
Why does Archie have his own page? ▼
Because Archie would consider anything less insulting. Also, he appears in emotes, songs, jokes, and household lore enough that containment became necessary.
What is Archie Time? ▼
Archie Time is the official desk-invasion warning. If Archie appears on Welshie’s desk, stream operations may be delayed due to royal supervision.
What does Archie eat? ▼
Officially: Sheba and actual cat food. Unofficially: chicken nuggets, Pizza, Dairylea cheese, anything cheesy, anything catnip-related, and anything he has decided belongs to him.
Who is Archie’s favourite human? ▼
Welshie. Archie has made this decision and no appeal process exists.
Why is Kawaii the favourite scratching post? ▼
Because Archie has standards. Apparently Kawaii is warm, available, and insufficiently intimidating.
Where does Archie like to sleep? ▼
Wherever Welshie was planning to sit, sleep, work, or exist. This is not a bug. It is policy.
Can Archie be bribed? ▼
Yes. Cheese, catnip, nuggets, and attention may work briefly. Results are not guaranteed.
Is Archie actually in charge? ▼
Yes. Everyone else is just paying bills and opening packets.
Can I support Archie’s food fund? ▼
Yes. Browse the store. Good merch, full belly, happy Archie. Allegedly.
Section Navigation
Back to Meet Welshie?
Return to Meet Welshie before Archie decides this page is now his throne room.
